Crucified Christ (Third Eye)

8x10 inch mixed media painting

A faded painted desert background with a centered pencil drawing on tracing paper adhered over it of a naked, bloody, crucified Christ. The Christ’s eyes are pure white, and He has an open Third Eye, a crown of thorns, and a halo. His hands are in a gesture of blessing, spelling “IC XC,” which is a four letter abbreviation of “Christ” in Greek, and one hand is outstretched in gentle greeting.

My relationship with Jesus Christ has changed significantly in my 30 years. I was raised as an Evangelical Christian, with all of the usual baggage that goes along with it. For the last 2-3 years I consistently denied the moniker of “Christian” for myself. I saw the damage done in the name of God, Their name taken in vain again and again, and I wanted nothing to do with it any longer. The context I had internalized for “God” was one founded on guilt and shame, and I needed a new way to be in the world, to cope with the world, dare I say to thrive in the world, and I did not find any solace in the idea of a good God who would allow such suffering. God was either all powerful or all loving, but based on the evidence I did not believe They could be both.

This painting is part of my journey through my relationship with the Divine, and with Jesus Christ, in particular. I am seeing Him with new eyes. He is not threatened by my doubt, by my lack of understanding, by my rejection of him, and still he welcomes me. I have never been able to let Him go, nor He I. We have been and will be in relationship forever. This is how he reveals Himself to me in this moment in time.